What do you remember about your parent’s home when you were growing up? Was it a warm and loving place to come home to? Was there laughter? Did you enjoy being with your family?
Do you remember kind and loving words said to you by your parents? Or was there negativity and criticism, shouting and fighting?
I [...]
A recent conversation with a mom with 3 little kids prompted my post on Getting Control of Your Frustrations.
Before I had kids, I was known to be a mild and gentle person. “Katy never gets mad.” But what happened to her after the kids came??
Children have the power to bring out the worst in [...]
I know how easy it is for a parent to lose it. Screaming, Stomping, Throwing things! I’ve been there.
I don’t know how they do it, but our cute little angels are adorable and cuddly one minute, and drive us insane the next.
But we are the adult here. We don’t need to be controlled by a [...]
I hope you had a chance to share a few special moments with your love ones.
Here are 14 things I love to do with my family:
1. Watching Mary Poppins while enjoying brownies with ice cream.
2. Playing video games together.
3. A stroll together after dinner under a clear night sky.
4. Staying up late playing a board [...]
The day was hectic.
After I took the kids to school, I met with difficult clients, followed up with a frustrating transaction, and fought traffic coming home.
There was nothing for dinner. I was hungry, tired, and irritated. “Get out of my way so I heat up some leftovers!” I snapped. I shouldn’t even have tried to [...]
In answer to a reader’s question, How do I pass our values on our children? I posted Part 1 and Part 2.
I conclude this series with some thoughts of what we can do when we feel we’ve failed.
Millie at Christian Values Legacy has an insightful article on “Seven Ways to Tell if Your Child is [...]
“Would you want to come home to yourself?”
That question changed my life.
Would I want to come home to hear myself nagging at me?
Would I want to come home to be criticized by me?
Would I want to come home to negativity, pestering, and meanness?
If I don’t want to come home to me, why would my children [...]
If you have more than one child, you know it is unrealistic to think you can treat them all “equally.”
With different interests, personalities, and ages, it is impossible to be “equal.” The pie cannot be cut precisely the same. You can hear it already – “It’s not fair; he got the bigger piece!”
Our standard response [...]
I recently came across the story of Bill Havens. The name is not a familiar one, but he is a hero to me.
In 1924, Bill was set to go to the Olympic games in Paris to compete in the newly added sport canoeing. He was in fact favored to win the gold for the United [...]
“We have two chances at a parent-child relationship.”
This is one of the most significant lessons I learned from Dr. Laura.
I don’t always agree with Dr. Laura, but she got me between the eyes with this one.
As new immigrants to the United States, my parents had to work a lot. They never attended any of my [...]
I am proud of my son, that despite my mistakes in parenting him – I had no experience with him as my first-born – he is turning out pretty well.
Yes, he’s always been a good student and all those things that moms are proud of in their kids.
But what I love best about him is [...]
I believe it was Gary Smalley who taught that everyone has an emotional tank. We function at our best when our emotional tank is full.
Here’s how it works.
When an emotional need is met, our tank gets a “deposit.” It fills up a bit.
A hug, an affirming word, a listening ear, laughter, good times together – [...]
“Mom, what can I have for breakfast?”
I yell from in front of the comfort of my computer screen: “There’s cereal. You can get it yourself.”
My 12-year-old is certainly old enough to get her own breakfast, why should I disturb my ease?
But there were nagging questions going on in my head:
1. Do I want to answer [...]
When I am shopping, I like to give a compliment to the clerks.
I look hard for something to give a sincere compliment. “That’s a nice necklace you have on” or “I like that color of nail polish on you.”
My ulterior motive is, if I am nice to them, they will give me better service!
Dale Carnegie’s [...]
What do we say to our children when they make an ugly face or cross their eyes?
“Your face and eyes are going to get stuck that way!”
In the same way, we can get into a habit of being negative and critical of our children that we get stuck that way.
Dale Carnegie writes this:
“Often parents are [...]
A friend who doesn’t have kids said today, “I am going to make sure that when I have kids, it’ll be when I am ready and really want them.”
I thought I was ready when I was 29 and had my first child. Yet, being a parent so changed my life beyond what I could’ve imagined.
Do [...]
Is it always bad to feel bad?
This is the second in a series about how negative situations can in fact be good for our children. Read the first one here.
“Come on guys, let’s go to a party.” Sure!
“Come on guys, let’s go to a funeral.” Silence.
Nobody really enjoys funerals. It’s solemn, it’s sad, and everyone [...]
I admit, we live a sheltered life here in the suburbs.
I’m not complaining. We like the relative peace and tranquility of suburbia. On the other hand, we cannot live with our heads in the sand.
In my zeal after reading about the devastating earthquake in China, I went berserk last night and lectured my 12-year-old about [...]
Imagine this, if you can:
Your daughter gets ready to leave the house in an outrageous outfit showing way too much skin, to say the least.
You reel on her and yell, “You are not going out of the house like that! You look like a slut. No decent boy will respect you.”
Your daughter pauses, looks at [...]
This is the second article in the series on Discipline.
Honestly, no one likes to be disciplined, isn’t that right? Whether you are an adult being disciplined by the law or by your boss, or you are a child disciplined by a teacher or by a parent, it’s definitely no fun.
Would you agree that you’ve made some mistakes as a parent?
Of course we all know the answer to that question. Everyday I make mistakes that I wish I could do over.
I should have not yelled at my kids. I should have gone to support my daughter’s band competition even though it was pouring rain. I [...]
Photo by kalandrakas
So we all want to be a better parent, right?
I am challenging myself and you along with me to the 30 Days to Better Parenting Challenge.
We do one thing a day for 30 days that will help us become better parents. Sounds doable, doesn’t it?
After 30 days, I hope we would have developed [...]
